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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24248998">Take Me Back</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/lala_the_rebel/pseuds/lala_the_rebel'>lala_the_rebel</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Sanders Sides (Web Series)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst with a Happy Ending, Gen, Swearing, Sympathetic Deceit Sanders</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 21:09:08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,635</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24248998</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/lala_the_rebel/pseuds/lala_the_rebel</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Now that Virgil’s been away from the dark sides for a while, he does miss them more than he cares to admit. But he’s not gonna let them know that. Not until he absolutely has to.</p><p>And, unfortunately for him, he does. At the worst possible time.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Anxiety | Virgil Sanders &amp; Deceit Sanders</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>122</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Take Me Back</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>this was inspired by a tumblr post in response to an ask i got<br/>the basic concept of said post: Virgil thought he was hurting the dark sides by staying with them so he leaves, but eventually he starts missing his family and unintentionally starts stealing their clothes. The light sides don't notice it, but during the filming of a video, Deceit does. He mentions it in front of all of them, and Virgil basically breaks down afterwards and explains what was going on.<br/>i originally posted it on tumblr on august 19th, 2019 (which means it was before deceit's name reveal)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It had been some time since Virgil left the dark sides. And he had grown to miss them more than he cared to admit.<br/>
<br/>
He kept convincing himself that staying with them was doing more harm than good. That was the whole reason why he left in the first place, right? To make things better? For him? For everyone else?<br/>
<br/>
He kept telling himself that. It worked for a while until the one time it didn't.<br/>
<br/>
Sure, the light sides had treated him as if he was always a part of their family, but it didn't always feel right. Especially when they did family things without you, and you knew about it, and they knew you knew, but they didn't do anything to include you. That was when it hurt.<br/>
<br/>
It reminded him that he really did miss what he used to have. They wouldn't have done that to him. He really was family to them. They would include him in everything they could, even if he did protest it a bit. It annoyed him at the time, but looking back now, he appreciated it. Not being listened to almost felt better than being listened to. Even though he complained, he still wanted to do things. He was glad that the light sides respected his boundaries, but there were times when he almost wished they didn't do it as much as they did.<br/>
<br/>
He didn't want to think about how much he missed the others, but he did. And the more he did, the more depressed he got. He couldn't go back now. They probably looked down on him for leaving without explanation. Even if he had explained it to them, would they have understood?<br/>
<br/>
The thoughts wracked his brain so much that it was hard to get to sleep. He woke up feeling really unrested, so he decided to make himself some coffee to try getting through the day. He was surprisingly the first one up, or at least the first up and out of their room. As he waited for his coffee to brew, he let his mind wander. It wouldn't have hurt to visit the dark side common room, would it? What's the worst thing he could do there? What's the worst thing they could do to him for being there?<br/>
<br/>
He would just be in and out. One short look. Just to see if things had changed. Nothing wrong with that, right?<br/>
<br/>
He kept mentally telling himself that as he sunk out into the other room. When he arrived, he expected the worst. He expected at least one of them to pop out and scare him. He got nothing. They were probably off in their rooms like everyone else was, he figured.<br/>
<br/>
He looked around, taking in the landscape. Nothing really changed. Still trashed as hell, maybe even more than usual. He didn't doubt that it was because Deceit had given up on cleaning it again. He remembered how the same thing happened before he left. He and Remus would band together to wreak as much havoc in the room as they could, and Deceit cleaned it up every time. It became such a hassle at one point that he had given up until the clutter bugged him. That, and neither of the other two were bothered to pick it up themselves.<br/>
<br/>
A bittersweet feeling rushed over him as he remembered that. He wondered if Remus actually continued doing it after he left, or if he stopped because it wasn't the same as before. Virgil wouldn't have known because he never talked to any of them besides the few times in the videos. He could very well have changed that now, but he didn't.<br/>
<br/>
He was supposed to just be in and out. No visiting. Visiting would give him emotions. He didn't want those. He wanted to stop doubting if he made the right choice or not, and if that meant not visiting the other two, then that would be the end of it.<br/>
<br/>
To get his mind off of things, he decided to walk around, as quietly as he could, of course. Get a full glance of everything while he could. He made a lap around the room, ending by the stairs. He saw a familiar sweater piled on the ground next to them. Upon further inspection, he realized it belonged to Deceit.<br/>
<br/>
It wouldn't have hurt to take it, would it?<br/>
<br/>
He snatched the sweater as quick as he could and sunk out. He then rushed to his room, totally unnoticed unlike what he feared. He inspected the sweater in detail. It was black and gray, striped, torn in a few spots, and a bit too big, but Virgil liked it nonetheless. It was definitely something he would own. He threw it in the dirty laundry, figuring it needed at least one wash cycle, and went back to go get his coffee that he unintentionally abandoned. As he drank it, the others finally made their arrivals, getting to their usual business. He watched it all from the sidelines, only interacting when one of the others addressed him. He didn't gather much besides the fact that a video was going to be filmed in the next few days. It didn't really bother him, so he went on with his day as if nothing out of the ordinary happened.<br/>
<br/>
That night, he somehow managed to sleep soundly; the visit from earlier cleared things up just a bit. It gave him the reassurance than at least nothing changed there physically. It was a small step of progress, but he took what he could get.<br/>
<br/>
When he woke up the next day, he found the sweater he stole in his clean laundry. He almost forgotten he had taken it until then. Something told him he should have worn it that day, so he did under his usual hoodie. He was complimented on it more than anything, which to him was a sign that they definitely didn't know it wasn't his. If they did, they didn't say anything to him at least. Along with that, it kinda helped relieve some of that homesickness he felt. At least that's what it felt like to him. He didn't know what to call it. He just knew that wearing it made him feel better than he did the day before, and that's what mattered to him more than anything.<br/>
<br/>
The temptation to go back to the room after that didn't take long to return. He fought it off for as long as he could, but one sleepless night ended that streak. He figured another venture to the room wouldn't hurt. When he got there, Deceit was around, asleep on the couch. Virgil decided to sneak past him up to the rooms so that he wouldn't wake him. He was successful, but he still kept cautious in case Remus would pop out at him. Thankfully, he didn't, so Virgil did some more snooping around. He even stole a few more pieces of clothing just for the hell of it before returning to his room and knocking out.<br/>
<br/>
The cycle kind of continued for a while after that. He didn't get caught, mostly because he was sneaking out at night when no one else should have been awake. And any of the clothes he gathered hardly raised suspicion; the others simply thought the outfits were his own entirely.<br/>
<br/>
Then came the dreaded day of video filming. They had worked for most of the morning, so they were taking a break for at least a couple hours. And during that break was when it all went down.<br/>
<br/>
They all decided to relax while they could. Roman and Patton put on a movie while Logan made himself coffee and caught up on other work. Virgil changed into a different outfit and chilled out by the stairs on his phone, barely listening to anything going on around him. It wasn't until Deceit arrived that he finally did.<br/>
<br/>
"Well, don't you all look very productive," the dark side sneered.<br/>
<br/>
Logan heard him and sighed. "What do you want, Deceit?" At the mention of his name, Patton and Roman jumped up from their spots on the couch while Virgil merely looked up at him with disinterest.<br/>
<br/>
"What are you doing here, Jack the Fibber?" Roman retorted.<br/>
<br/>
"What? Am I not allowed to just simply hang out?"<br/>
<br/>
"That's not part of your usual behavior around us, so that is mostly the reason for their concerns, I'm sure," Logan explained without missing a beat. "Plus, you have your own designated space to hang out, so there is no real need to intrude into ours."<br/>
<br/>
"Yeah, what he said!" Roman agreed.<br/>
<br/>
Deceit glared at Logan before continuing. "Well, maybe I want to change that behavior. You know I can't not be nice to you of all people, Roman."<br/>
<br/>
"Really?"<br/>
<br/>
"That's the biggest batch of bullshit I've ever heard," Virgil piped up. "We all know you get your kicks on teasing Roman because half the time he can't tell if you're lying or not."<br/>
<br/>
"I do not-"<br/>
<br/>
"Yeah, okay. That's not what you've told me, but sure."<br/>
<br/>
Deceit sighed. "Information can easily be outdated, Virgil, so don't be too sure you know everything you think you do."<br/>
<br/>
"Oh, I'm pretty sure on that, considering literally everyone here knows you as a liar. There's no way you can prove what you said was true and you know it."<br/>
<br/>
"I mean, his statement does have some truth to it," Logan interrupted.<br/>
<br/>
"Shut up, Logan! I'm trying to prove my point here!" Virgil barked.<br/>
<br/>
"How pathetic. Blocking out the truth so that you have what you think is a solid argument? Sounds like we have a hypocrite here," Deceit said with a laugh. "Getting on me for the exact same thing you do fits that definition, don't you think? Or, is it a double standard because you're a light side now?"<br/>
<br/>
Virgil had enough. "Just shut your damn mouth up! No one wants to argue with you over stupid shit. If that's all you came here for, then leave. We don't want that here."<br/>
<br/>
Deceit turned to him, rolling his eyes and smirking. "I rest my case- wait." He did a double take. "Is that my sweater you're wearing?" Virgil's eyes went wide as he took in what Deceit said. He felt everyone's eyes staring him down as they awaited his answer. He didn't speak, which prompted Deceit to ask another question. "Is that where they've been going? Have you been stealing them? Have you been stealing my stuff?"<br/>
<br/>
"N-no." He avoided the looks he was getting. "It's...it's mine."<br/>
<br/>
"Seems like someone's taken over the resident liar position," Deceit remarked. He stared Virgil down until he looked him in the eye, and when he did, he gave him a simple eyebrow raise. "But if you insist, then I'll let it go." He continued to stare at Virgil, noticing his teary eyes.<br/>
<br/>
Virgil met his gaze until he couldn't bear to do it anymore. He couldn't bear to be there anymore. "I'm...gonna go to my room," he said solemnly before sinking out. He heard the others telling him to come back, but he ignored them. There was no way he was going to explain this to them if they weren't going to understand.<br/>
<br/>
He didn't sink out to his room. He ended up sinking out to the dark side common room unintentionally. He didn't care as long as he could get away. He curled himself into a ball and slowly let the tears go.<br/>
<br/>
It didn't take long for Deceit to pop up after him. He looked at Virgil, unsure of what to say. Virgil had known he was there, but didn't acknowledge him. Instead, he just curled even more into himself, hoping he would go away.<br/>
<br/>
He didn't. "You know, last time I checked, this isn't your room." Virgil didn't answer. He sighed, then knelt down to Virgil's eye level. He stared him down, despite being ignored. Talking was worth a shot. "I...apologize if what I said has upset you." He got Virgil's attention, but the other side remained silent. Deceit continued. "I didn't mean to call you out in front of...them."<br/>
<br/>
"Yeah, right," Virgil mumbled.<br/>
<br/>
"I'm serious. I'm not that much of an asshole, believe it or not. If I didn't notice it then, I wouldn't have said anything until later. But I did, and I impulsively said something. And, now I know I shouldn't have. I hope you don't hate me too much more for it."<br/>
<br/>
Virgil finally looked him in the eye, unsure of his sincerity. Sure, it was written pretty clearly on his face, but he was a master of deception. Virgil wanted to doubt that what he said was true, but he didn't for now. Something told him not to. "You mean it?"<br/>
<br/>
A nod. "Absolutely. And I assure you, I'm not lying."<br/>
<br/>
Hearing that made him tear up even more. For once, Deceit sounded serious when he said it. No sarcastic edge, no over-the-top line delivery, nothing. Just pure emotion. Something in the way he said it made Virgil believe that he had really still cared for him a bit, even though his actions said otherwise. It was more than likely just an act at that point. Just to save face for the light sides. Both of them being dark sides made them as close to family as they could get, and the bond they had couldn't be easily broken, no matter how long ago Virgil left. They both knew that on some level.<br/>
<br/>
And doing that compelled Virgil to do something he hadn't done in a while. He leaned forward and latched onto Deceit, hugging him. He was surprised at first, but he knew Virgil needed it and returned it. He could feel the other's chest heaving as he sobbed into him, but he didn't care one bit. He could tell Virgil needed it. He helped calm him down before he started talking again.<br/>
<br/>
"I'm not mad at you for taking my stuff, by the way. You could have just asked me for it if you wanted it so bad."<br/>
<br/>
"I know, but...I…I had a reason for it," Virgil mumbled.<br/>
<br/>
"Which was?"<br/>
<br/>
Virgil finally pulled away and looked at him. His eyeshadow was definitely smudged now, but that was easily fixable. He wiped his nose with his hoodie sleeve and got to explaining. "I...I miss you guys."<br/>
<br/>
"You...do?"<br/>
<br/>
Virgil nodded with a sniff. "I miss doing stuff with you and being with you because the others don't do as much stuff with me anymore because I said one time that I didn't want to do anything and they took it literally." He swiped his nose again. "And it made me really...sad, so to feel better, I've been coming down here and sneaking around and stealing your stuff and wearing it so that I have something to remind me of you guys. Of...home, I guess." A sniff. "I left because I thought I was hurting you guys, but it looks like I'm just hurting myself, y'know, figuratively. And I don't wanna come back completely, but...I guess I just wanna visit sometimes if that's okay with you. I just want you...to take me back as family."<br/>
<br/>
Deceit nodded, taking in everything he said. "You hurt us more by leaving and not saying anything. But, now that you have, I do forgive you. And I understand." He was teary-eyed now. "And you're welcome back home any time. You haven't stopped being family, trust me."<br/>
<br/>
Virgil went and hugged him again, and he immediately hugged him back. "Thank you. So much."<br/>
<br/>
"You're definitely welcome. Now, I do want those stolen sweaters back, if you don't mind."</p>
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